On breaking up with my dream job

One and a half years ago I started at my dream job: a place I was prepared to stay and build and learn for many years. When I wrote the first draft of this reflection, it was the Monday after my last day at Peloton. I was squished in a plane seat, flying home for the holidays. And earlier that morning, I’d opened Slack by habit – before realizing I’d already logged out for the last time. 

I wrote in 2021 about my personal mission to make fitness inclusive and about how working at Peloton was intended to test a career hypothesis: “I am mission-driven…[and] would feel motivated and fulfilled working in the fitness tech space.” This hypothesis is proven true. 

First, I was so motivated I gave myself a typing-induced repetitive stress injury just two months in. De Quervain’s tenosynovitis (like carpal tunnel, but in the thumb) derailed my personal powerlifting training. I went from lifting hundreds of pounds to being unable to grip a barbell (or a pen, or turn a key in the doorknob) for over half a year. So I was plenty motivated – and it was pretty ironic that my over-dedication to a fitness tech job briefly cratered my personal pursuit of fitness. 

Second, little joys sprung up throughout the workday. A teammate and I walked into a meeting room, only to commence an impromptu lifting session when we found a pair of dumbbells there. My cousin, a Peloton fanatic, was visiting NYC for her 1000th ride; I got to show her the Peloton rower. Our team lifted together in the Peloton gym; on the outdoor patio, one of our marketers, a talented former group class instructor, led us in intense circuit-style training. Some days, I’d wake up to a Facebook notification from a group like this one, bursting at the seams with posts about how Peloton had transformed Members’ lives. The nature of just existing in a workspace that mirrored my personal mission-passion made me happy.

Of course, the company I’m leaving also looks very different from the company I joined 1.5 years ago. There have been 4 rounds of layoffs, dropping the total number of employees from ~7K to ~4K. The stock is 95% down from its pandemic-darling high. Under our new CEO, we publicly sharpened and shifted our focus, leaning into digital app growth. Our group has reorged multiple times, and I have had (and learned from!) three different managers. (Peloton’s not alone here as macroeconomic conditions have shifted: every other fitness company I had an offer from has had layoffs since and in some cases let go of the team I’d have joined.)

Despite, and in some part because of these changes, this was my dream job for quite a while. The changes were organizationally and emotionally challenging but also opened career learning opportunities as we rebuilt a new Peloton. Indeed, the role I’m leaving looks nothing like the role I joined 1.5 years ago. I started as an individual contributor but quickly started people managing and then leading the B2B product team. The original scope was to help build Corporate Wellness but grew to encompass a $XXXM portfolio across Corporate Wellness, Partnerships, Healthcare, and more. I’m lucky to have had the opportunity to lead teams and build new products amidst incredible ambiguity. 

But in the end, I found myself missing a few things:

• Working in consumer product.
• Surfing the complexities of developing cutting-edge tech – the kind that scales to billions, models the world, and that research papers and patents are awarded for.
• A culture that is more engineering- and product- first; I personally experienced Peloton as more finance- and strategy- driven.

Choosing to leave was a heart-wrenching decision. I felt guilty for leaving friends and teammates “behind” in a company that’s still mid-turnaround. I worried that I’d be taking a step backwards from how I wanted to be spending my time. But I also hold:

• Hope that friendships formed will grow regardless of whether we’re within Peloton’s (virtual) walls.
• Peace that I’ve done my best to set my teammates up for success in how we’ve built the business, grown our scope, and laid out the product vision ahead.
• Confidence that I can fulfill my personal mission around strength training inclusion through direct impact, including coaching my friends and family. And I’m already pursuing my other personal mission around LGBTQ+ equality and safety through ongoing nonprofit work.
• Big(!) excitement for my next gig and how much I’ll learn and impact.

As this ride ends, I’m left with gratitude: for my time at Peloton, for my leaders’ trust, for my dear friends, for what I’ve been able to learn about myself and about the product craft (stay tuned for future pieces on this!). And I’ll stay in wistful disbelief that I was lucky to work on something I love.